Top 4 self -help books!

Lately I’ve been getting into self-help books, but I’ve been more interested in listening to them in the form an audiobook as opposed to reading them for no other reason than how it is easier to press “play” on my drive to Tampa instead of waiting till I get home and when I’m in a quiet place to read.

After going through approximately 10 audiobooks, all the while cleaning, doing homework, commuting, etc, there have been 3 particular books that I have taken to re-reading, that’s how great they were.

  1.  You are a Badass – Jen Sincero. “Her name says it all,” my friend who I referred the book to says to me. “Sounds like Genuinely Sincere.” And Sincero is real as all get out, as she expertly explains how to manifest the life you want in a no-nonsense way she has used to get to point where she is now. I found the free audiobook on Youtube, finishing it in 2 days. Sincero, a writer at heart, has a knack for incorporating all of her life stories into gold nuggets of advice that you will be able to think of when someone at your next family reunion asks you why the hell you’ve quit your day job to move across the country and start a Yoga studio.
  2. Wild Goose Chase – Mark Batterson. A new friend of mine slipped me this short book one night, and boy am I happy she did. In this book, Batterson compares the Holy Spirit to the wild goose, as the Holy Spirit works in the present moment and allows us to use our intuition to run after all that God has in store for us, making our lives an adventure. The Wild Goose is said to be “ever-elusive,” as it can never be ‘caught.’ All our lives, everyone around us is trying to ‘catch’ that perfect life. The perfect person, the perfect job, and the list goes on. Wild Goose Chase makes clear that our lives can be fulfilled if only we listen to the calling in our hearts in the present moment that is the Holy Spirit, and is in many ways, compared to the wind (John 3:8).
  3. This next one is a little funny, so bear with me. I typed in ‘audiobook’ on YouTube, and literally clicked on the first video that popped up, reading “(Full Audiobook) This Book Will Change Everything! (Amazing!).” I was skeptical. However, after giving the book a chance, I was instantly hooked. The book is authorized by a gentlemen whose name has slipped my mind. He is a man with big dreams, and he goes into detail about how each day, he would spend a great deal of time manifesting, praying, and even looking at printed-out photos of the things he wished to manifest. The result? All if his dreams came to be. His journey, however, is the more interesting part.
  4. You do You – Sarah Knight. This book deepened my understanding of what it means to be selfish, or what Knight refers to as ‘self-ISH’. It is one thing to be self-absorbed, but a totally different thing to practice intense self-love, which in result, can get you places. Places you’ve always dreamed of going in life.

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The girl that has more guy friends

I’ve heard the sentence,

“I have more guy friends than I do girl friends”

come out of every single one of my friend’s lips, and yet we all flip the switch to

“guys suck” when it comes to relationships. Disclaimer: I’m not saying I’m guilt free of this.

But I’ve been doing some thinking, and I have a few theories as to why girls like to say that they’d rather chill with the dudes on a Friday night.

  1. It has almost become a thing to say, whether we realize it or not, that we try to convey to others that we are not high maintenance people. In other words, we might have an equal amount of guy to girl friends, but we like to say that “all of our friends are guys,” because this has become an accepted way of saying, “I think girls are pretty full of drama, and I like how guys are drama-free. Oh yeah, and they think I’m cool too, so there is my seal of chill-proval.”
  2. In a way we have all disowned us being female. Think about it. Usually our reason backing this sentence refers to following with, “Well, girls are just too full of drama!” Which, can be true. But the friends that we choose are our CHOICE. There are many girls that are not full of drama, and we are responsible for finding these friends that we can relax around. I don’t know if it’s fair of us to say that “girls are too much,” when we know that we all have our flaws, drama, and extremities that we carry with us. Maybe it’s really that, we don’t want to look in the mirror and see someone who is similar to us, so instead we prefer to hang with the guys, who typically aren’t focused on the same things we are, therefore, acting as a sort of distraction. It’s nice stepping away from the mirror. But girls relate to girls the best, and we all can understand and sympathize to each other the most.
  3. Therefore, I believe that if a girl says this and truly means it, she just hasn’t found the right girlfriends that will accept her for who she is, leaving drama and competition at the door.

Just some late night thoughts,

Have a blessed Thursday.

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xo,

lands

 

The Body of Christ

I was told as a little girl that the Body of Christ is a metaphor for a bunch of Christians. Lately, my perspective of this metaphor has altered.

The Body of Christ isn’t some religious jargon phrase created to make Christians feel like they are part of something. It is the definition of the spiritual experience felt when those who have the holy spirit living within them get together and form community. It is euphoric feeling when God puts a group of his creations together, all contributing important “parts” of his own, such as a deep compassion for others, a listening ear, and a broken heart that was transformed to help one another. We are all vital parts that contribute to the whole.

The Body of Christ is the foundation for true community and friendship.

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#poetryoutlet

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freedom is accidentally crashing your car into a tree
and deciding to get ice cream
to celebrate still being alive
the issue will sort itself out

freedom is not letting the conventional ways of thinking about issues
actually stand in the way of your
personal
happiness

 

#poetryoutlet

 

club target (2).pngto change
is to escape the home you’ve made for yourself in your head

you’ll be judged
you’ll value your newfound happiness
over their judgements

i swear it’ll set you free
if you stop watering the thorns
of dying roses
life’s hard enough
you don’t need to add peer evaluation to the equation

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it only makes for a tougher equation

i already hate math

none of us are ever going to be good enough
our criteria of how to be
comes from those who don’t know what they’re doing

being honest
may not always win you favor
but it’s another way to capture the essence
of who you are
and in return
happiness
like a developing polaroid
honesty may leave you with nothing at first
but develops over time

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i’ve felt a rush run over my life
like running an ice cube on a wound
the ocean hugging my feet at the shore
happiness is so easy
once you fall back in love with yourself

 

The YES theory

For the past two years, my life has changed for the better.

It started when I decided on a whim to drive out to Ocala, FL one July and work as a lifeguard for a Young Life camp, Southwind, two years back. There I discovered the many ways the universe can speak to me if I just followed where my gut is wanting to go. From concurring my fear of saving lives, to meeting (and living with) people of my age where I normally would have extreme social anxiety, I became a bit more fearless and felt as if by making this decision to become a lifeguard was more than just that, but it was also the catalyst I needed to find my way in other aspects of my journey. When camp was nearing to a close, I met a (then) 19 year old guy, Chapman, who mentioned to me something called, “the yes theory.” After conversing with him about this intriguing life choice that has gotten him very far since he started it, he wrote down for me on a napkin the main points needed to understand and obtain this yes theory, or what he likes to call the “fear slayer.”

  1. Identify what it is you want in life that is obtainable in the present time, and do those things, ESPECIALLY if you’re scared. Most of the time, like I’ve experienced, the things that we do just because we feel like they are the right things to do in the moment lead us to bigger and better things, making it VERY clear why this has been put in our head in the first place.
  2. Our destiny is formed from the chances we do and do not take. By not taking the chances we wish to take, we are also taking a chance.
  3. From the little things, like attempting to go Vegan for the 5th time even though it never worked before, to the big things, like buying a solo ticket to Italy and staying for a while just because you feel called to do so, your life will change equally. In other words, there is no mathematics system where things are going to affect your life “a lot or a little.” When you follow this yes theory, it is more of a points system, adding to the finished “grade” that is your life. The more yes chances you take, the better.
  4. Time flies on by and we always think the moments we have in front of us will be our reality for longer than they actually end up being. Even if the chance you take leaves you high and dry, it is a chance that came from the heart, and nothing lasts forever.
  5. We should think of ourselves as voyagers of our own life, not passengers. If you are living a life you don’t understand or like, get tf out of there and go chase your dreams.
  6. Every single time I’ve said yes without thinking more than 5 seconds to do something that gives me goosebumps and dear trickling down my spine, I have NEVER regretted the outcome. Furthermore, those chances I’ve taken, such as traveling here from Virginia to volunteer my time for only a week, have brought me so much more joy and understanding. Life isn’t always about what you can anticipate getting out of things, it’s about going after the things that scare you and getting things out of your journey that you didn’t plan on, like a new elderly friend that you can write to when you’re feeling down, or a late-night conversation with someone in your cabin that, 3 years from now, you can think back on and cherish.

 

Need I say more? The guy is a genius, and since then I have always remembered these 6 principles, applying them to my life as often and as best as I can. The last time I applied the yes theory to my life was when I was deciding where I wanted to work over this summer (2018). I knew I needed to get a job somewhere, and it depressed me a bit to think of staying in Florida and working somewhere like a restaurant. In my mind, I was ready to aim high and start applying to different places, resumes in hand. However, my soul was not buying it. I found myself, for some reason, fantasizing about North Carolina and all there is to offer there, especially the Blue ridge parkway near Asheville. I downloaded tons of songs on Spotify titled “Carolina,” and I was slowly manifesting a trip there without really consciously knowing it. Sure enough, when I was looking on Coolworks.com one afternoon, I came across a camp that was seeking Lifeguards in the Blue Ridge mountains. This was more than enough of a sign for me, and after a week I got the job. I will be staying there for most of the summer, getting paid, living for a low rent, and eating for free. My other jobs when I’m not Lifeguarding will be helping with the adventure course (eek! this will definitely bring me out of my comfort zone!) as well as helping lead backpacking trips. Oh, and did I mention that pool is 55 feet deep?

My newest adventure awaits.

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xo,

lands

Providence Canyon, slice of hope

Yesterday my two roommates and I were all talking in the kitchen, discussing our love for travel and making loose plans to road-trip over the summer.

Until Harley spoke up.

“What’s stopping us from driving somewhere tomorrow?”

We all looked at each other and smiled. We’ve had many instances of plans falling through do to our different schedules and last minute excuses, so it’s almost funny when someone suggests something “for-real.”

“I’m all for it.” I wanted badly to get away for a little while. This college town wears on me like crusty mascara.

Then, suddenly, we were discussing the details. Who would drive, how gas was going to be cheap if we took the two and a half hour trek to Providence Canyon, Georgia, and just how beautiful it was going to be. We’d all seen pictures of the beautiful hiking trail, but none of us had actually been there. Why not give it a shot in the dark?

On Friday, Harley and I picked up Danielle from class at noon, swung by a Vegan lunch place to pick up baguette-style avocado toast for the road, and were on our way to away. Everyone had their turn to play music, and with the windows rolled down, rolling terrain that let us all know we were not in Florida anymore and happy hearts, we made our road-trip a reality in less than 24 hours.

When we arrived, we couldn’t yet see the canyon. I kind of liked this, because I wanted this to be our reward from hiking. When we followed each other on the red clay pathway, we breathed in the forrest air. It was a beautiful and quiet hike, none of us feeling the need to fill the silence with unnecessary chatter. We were nearing a bend, and caught a tiny glimpse of the red canyons. Looking past a DANGER: DO NOT ENTER sign, my roommates and I shimmied over the fence, feeling like high schoolers looking for trouble.

What we found?

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The most beautiful view I have seen in a long, long time. Red canyons, imperfect and untouched pathways, a red, pizza-like pathway to nowhere..

I was the first to stand on this pizza slice of fear, wanting to thrill myself. Looking down, I saw that from where I was standing on either side, the clay could crumble down and I’d find myself falling hundreds of feet. I walked further onto it, away from the “crust” of the pizza, closed my eyes, and felt free.

My roommates followed after me. What can I say? I’m not the best example. Or am I?

We took photos on this pizza of thrill, sure that not many people who have hiked this trail have been able to take the same photos.

This was the best part of the hike: taking a spontaneous risk that pushed my boundaries a little further, an appetizer for my adventure craving. I needed to find this pizza of thrill in order to truly adore this trail and it’s sights, not just look at the breathtaking view alongside the trail path’s viewing sights and move along.

Driving home, I realized that these trips were to me as necessary as studying for exams.

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